Considerations in Choosing a Marriage Partner

(Sunday School Course 17; Lesson 25)

Are you good friends with the person you desire to marry?

How do your interests, goals, expectations, and basic values compare?  How about occupations, parents, friends, Church callings, educational pursuits, and leisure-time activities?

What do you feel should be the top priority in your life: family, Church, business?  Can you communicate honestly and deeply with your potential spouse?  Have you both learned to express feelings, ideas, and suggestions without giving or taking offense?  Have you learned how to resolve misunderstandings and differences of opinion?

How do you make decisions that affect both of you?  After marriage, how will the husband preside as a patriarch and head of the family?  Will he look upon his wife as a knowledgeable counselor and partner in decision=making?  Will he respect her opinions?  Consider her needs?

Have you gone together long enough to see each other in a variety of social settings?  do you like each other's friends?  Has your relationship improved over the course of time?

Have you associated with each other's family enough to know them and the background of your potential partner?  How does your potential spouse treat family members?  Are you willing to accept the other's family?  The background?

How can or will your parents enhance your marriage?  Are there any potential in-law problems?  Are you ready to be independent of parents and "cleave unto" your spouse?

Have you both obtained adequate training and skills for financial stability in marriage?  How will the money be managed?  Have you both learned how to prepare a budget?  Who will pay the bills?  Keep the checkbook?  Do you have similar expectations for the use of credit cards, charge accounts, savings, debt, the acquisition of material possessions?

Are there serious religious differences between you?  Even though you both may be Latter-day Saints, are you equally committed to the gospel?  Is each worthy and prepared for temple marriage?  Will you be willing to support one another in Church assignments?

To what degree are you committed to tithing and other financial offerings in the Church?

After marriage are either or both of you going to seek additional occupational training or education?  Have adequate financial plans been made for this possibility?

Will the wife attend or complete college?  Does either of you plan for her to work outside the home after marriage?  After children are born?

Have you discussed having children?  How many do you want and when?  What kind of parent will your potential spouse be?  How will you work together in teaching and disciplining the children?

Are you both knowledgeable about keeping an orderly home and yard?  What do you consider to be the man's role?  the woman's role?  The combined role?